I have learned recently how important it is to let go. Just simply letting go. It doesn’t matter if they were happy times or sad times, it feels good to let go and move on. The topic of letting go and moving on can be a bit sensitive for some people. Some people haven’t learned how to do that. Some people need to learn how to do that. Sadly to say, I used to be one of those people. I held on to things, people, memories and feelings more than I would have liked to. I just couldn’t let things go. It may be because of how I grew up and how I interacted with others. It may be because of the type of behavior I saw exhibited towards me, It may be because of a million and one things, but the point is that I held on, held on too much, held on for too long, held on when it was sad, held on when it was happy, held on for no reason, just held on.
It was when I started realizing that holding on to things and not letting go was hindering me from my ability to have fun and live life. I wasn’t able to live in the present. I was always living in some kind of a world, where the past was somehow more important to me than what was happening in the present moment. The past was somehow more magical and had more meaning because I could never go back. The fact that it already happened made it more attractive to me, instead of what was happening right there at the present moment. Holding on became a way I knew how to cope. I didn’t know any other way. I didn’t start questioning this way of living until everything that I knew bursted right there on my face and I had to create new and healthy ways of coping.
It wasn’t until I was hurt badly by people I didn’t expect that I knew that holding on was no longer serving me. It wasn’t until things became too much for me to handle that I truly questioned that my coping mechanisms were unhealthy and desperately needed to change. It wasn’t until I started experiencing things I never thought I would that I started to learn that these things were going to keep happening because, well duh, life, and I needed a better way to deal. This was when the magic of letting go happened. I started letting shit go.
That time when I was only 12 years old and I wanted to play with these groups of kids and I didn’t get to, I let it go. That time my friend couldn’t give me a ride home despite the fact that it was 9pm simply because she didn’t want to, I let it go. That time I felt I wasn’t good enough to be apart of a summer program I really wanted to be apart of simply because they didn’t want me there, I let it go. That time when I didn’t have the energy to leave my bed because all of the sadness that I could imagine was in my heart, I let it go. That time when my friend broke my heart because she told me she didn’t want me in her life anymore, I let it go. That time when I wasn’t given acknowledgement for a superb job I did despite the fact that I did it so well, I let it go. That time, that time and that time. I let all of the times go.
I lived my best life in all of those times to the best of my knowledge. I lived in the best ways I knew how. I loved in all the ways my heart knew how. I can’t lament on those moments any longer. I can’t devour those moments any longer. They are gone. They are gone. They are gone. They have disappeared into thin air and became sweet and not-so-sweet memories. They will sure add on to all of my crazy, great, beautiful, and lovely experiences and will shape my life the way they’re supposed to. After I started letting it all go, it became easier, life felt good again, great people started walking into my life and blessed me with their ease. I became gentle with myself, kinder with myself, loving myself and, here I am now embracing all of my past, living all of my present and, hoping the best for all of my future. The art of letting go is truly a beautiful one. Please do it.
Peace and Love,